Hard Thoughts

It’s been one crazy morning and before I started sewing, I had to do some journaling.

Earlier this week I was folding my kid’s laundry and as I stood there folding all these cute clothes I was just overcome with joy that I am able to stay home, that I have kids to do laundry for and I was thinking how I really need to keep this attitude all the time (doesn’t Paul admonish us to do this?? do everything w/o complaining but consider it pure joy…something along those lines). But as life does, the next day I stared at another pile (actually it was 3 loads) of laundry to fold and I honestly didn’t have that same outlook. I hate that!

And then this morning, we were blocked into our driveway by an unmarked police or FBI car. I soon found out that our neighbor’s son was being searched for. This is a man whom we’ve had many conversations with over the years we’ve lived here. We love his mom and she is so sweet to our kids; he is so sweet to our kids. I told the officer that, and his response was “they always are!” So I’m faced with the dilemma of loving both of them despite what is going on (hate the sin, love the sinner thing) and that is so hard because I feel like we’ve been lied to about him and his problems. Once again, I feel admonished to love my neighbors despite what is going on. That is so hard!

God is surely teaching me something about love and joy.

Another Contest

I have been working on this burp cloth for longer than I should admit, hopefully the second won’t take as long! I finally finished it all up today and wanted to post pictures of it. You can see more on the flickr set.

I am entering another web/blog contest off of this site. (My picture is already up…I’m famous!! ha ha)

The judging is February 4…wish me luck! 🙂

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Update

I have written here in the past about our struggles with our little guy and school and behavior and all that. I felt that it was time for an update. He has been going to his new school for the past month and honestly I have seen the biggest difference. It is such a positive atmosphere (180 degrees from his old school) and that truly has made an impact. I think cutting down on the number of days he is at school (he only goes 2 days now instead of 5 mornings) and being at home more has also made a big difference. Overall, his whole attitude is different and while we are still struggling with tantrums and such, they have become fewer and quicker. We constantly have to remind ourselves that he is only 4!

On another note, we have officially decided to hold him out of Kindergarten one year and start him when he is nearly 6. The blessing of this new school is that they have a 5 year old class that is a kindergarten transition/readiness and had we not gotten in this spring, it is highly unlikely he would be able to get in this class for the Fall.

God does provide what we need for sure!

The Sacred Hour

2:00-3:00 is the sacred hour in our house, especially during the week when DH is working and I’m here alone. It is the hour that both kids are for sure asleep in their rooms and I know that I have a few moments alone. It is the hour that I have to make a choice…

This is what I want to do:
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This is what I need to do
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Which do you think actually happens?

What I’m Dreaming Of

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I have this horrible corner in our living room/playroom/office that I have dubbed my crafting area. I would post a picture of it, but it looks so bad right now; piled high with tons of projects to do and those done.

After thinking and thinking about the space I wanted to create, I finally figured out what I want and this is it! This is a picture from Cottage Magpie’s blog and I just love and am so jealous of her space. I told my dear sweet hubbie that this is what I want for my birthday! Cross your fingers. Hopefully I’ll post pictures of my new sewing/crafting spot in the coming months.

Life

It has amazed me over and over again since I have been at home how God has placed certain books, verses, people etc in my life. I have felt again and again the amazing timing and provision of God. Today was one of those days. I’ve ignored this book, Sacred Rhythms, for the past week and chosen other things to do or read. It was almost like God truly led me to that book today and to this section.

We are facing a crossroads right now in our lives. We have the choice to stay in TN or possibly relocate with Larry’s job. It has been a crazy roller coaster ride these last few days and we don’t know which end is up. This is what I read today:

One of the most important lessons I have learned over the past few years is how important it is to have time and space for being with what’s real in my life-to celebrate the joys, grieve the losses, shed my tears, sit with the questions, feel my anger, attend to my loneliness. This “being with what is” is not the same thing as problem solving or fixing, because not everything can be fixed or solved. Rather, it means allowing God to be with me in that place and waiting for him to do what is needed.
When we don’t attend to our vulnerabilities and instead try to repress it all and keep soldiering on, we get weary from holding it in. Eventually it leaks out in ways that are damaging to us and to others.
Another reason we are so tired is that we are always working hard to figure things out rather than learning how to cease striving, how to be with what is true in God’s presence and let God be God in the most intimate places of our life-which is, in the end, the only thing that will change anything. We’re busy trying to make stuff happen rather than waiting on God to make stuff happen.
Exodus 14:13-14 Do not be afraid, stand firm, and see the deliverance that the Lord will accomplish for you today; for the Egyptians whom you see today you shall never see again. The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to keep still.
Sit quietly at the base of the tree that is your life and begin to notice what is true about you these days. Don’t rush or try to make things anything happen. Let your soul venture out…feel the difference between trying to fix it and just being with it, between doing something and just resting, between fighting it and letting God fight it.

This is what I am sitting with today:

moving, cars, jobs, working, debt and money

each problem so big and each decision so large and all looming, how could I even begin to try and solve it or fix it?