I’ve been wrestling a lot with the word “ambition” lately.
I spend way more time than I should on the internet and in doing that I think it alters what my ambition should be.
when you spend minutes looking at others lives
others houses
read about the way others parent
or school
or run their homes
it easily begins to crowd out what the Lord leads me to be and do.

Beth Moore says so perfectly:
“God desires to purify all other motives of ambition in us except the ambition that God would use us and draw attention to Himself and His great name.”

The Lord is slowly, oh so painfully at times, destroying my ambitions and replacing them with nothing but an open Spirit for God to move in me.
My ambitions to control
speed along
puff up myself (oh those darn blog stats and facebook notifications)
and surrender those to Him.
Redeeming my failures,
my sin
as assets for him.

So as this season of lent begins this week, I find myself needing to give up something and I think it’s going to be blog reading. Closing down my reader
closing down looking at others lives
what others have
what I think I need to have to make my life better or make me a better parent
and focus on this house and those in it.

And I will cry like the Psalmist:

Test me O Lord and try me (with the confidence that I will see the goodness of the Lord…Ps 27:13)
examine my heart and my mind
for your love is ever before me
and I walk continually in your truth
(the truth that you want me to prosper, to have no harm and your truth is hope and a future…Jer 29:11)
(from Ps 26)

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