intentions and truth

I have come to realize two things that have/have not ruled my life lately…intentions and truth.

By intentions I mean: for what or who am I doing such and such?

When I go to a book, when I go the computer, when I spend too much time reading blogs, when I post a facebook status…for what reason am I doing it? The truth for me is that, more often than not, the intention is escape. Don’t get me wrong, we all need a break or escape from the things in our lives that wear us down. God gave us the Sabbath because He knew we would need a rest from this weary world. But, for me, escape often means not dealing with what is in front of me.

When my kids have been/are being tough,

when I have argued with my husband,

when I have struggled with my parents

when I have…. fill in the blank

do I come to the Lord? Do I crash onto my knees and ask for His patience and wisdom?

I don’t. I escape.

I have often struggled with blogging and writing and sewing and all these things in my life that are “out there” in cyber world. For what purpose do I sew? It is a relief for sure, but more often it is a reaction to fear. Fear that I have to do something to contribute financially to our one-income family or that I have to find ways to make ends meet.

For what purpose do I blog? It is also a relief, but more often it’s the satisfaction of the stats of the comments of the thoughts of man.

In my struggles with overcoming anxiety and fear, I am learning to cling to truth.

To cling to Christ. To cling to His Word and what it promises me.

It promises me that if my intention is for MY gain or to try and satisfy my fears.

i. will. fail.

but if I ask for His help, wisdom, guidance and shelter

he. will. provide.

Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?

“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.  If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith?

Truth is, I am more valuable to God than I could even begin to imagine. He clothes the grasses of the field in garments even greater than Solomon and I am so much more than grass.

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